7 Things That Keep You In Your Comfort Zone
Have you ever thought about the things that keep you in your comfort zone? Many people I work with seem to have lots of ‘reasons’ to stay there…. but are these things reasons, or are they excuses? When I work with them to unpack what’s going on that’s holding them back I have found it is generally one (or more) of 7 things that is keeping them within that dreaded comfort zone. Do you recognise any of these?….
Many people love the idea of a life beyond limitations, but just don’t actually expect to be able to achieve it for themselves – they may dream of travelling, earning 6 figures, or incredible adventures, but when it comes down to it they don’t expect to be able to create magical experiences in their own lives. These people often expect obstacles and stumbling points to show up along the way.
Raising your expectations to enable you to step out of your comfort zone is a two-part process, which involves challenging your beliefs, and being intentional about calling in more of what you want and being ready for it to arrive. Working with intentions and affirmations on a regular basis can really support you through this process, and get you raising your expectations of what is heading your way.
Don’t Know Where To Start
Lots of people will have great ideas of where they want to get to, but they never take the first step, because they just don’t know where to start. Anyone that knows me will know that I’m a much bigger fan of working with intentions than I am of working with goals, but in this instance, goals are definitely the way forward.
To find your route out of the comfort zone, you need to know two things, Just like with using any map you need to know where you want to get to, AND where you are in relation to that. Once you are able to gain clarity on those two things then knowing where, and how, to get started is so much easier, because you have to start from where you are!
Just like working out any route, you then need to work out the small steps that will take you in the right direction – so for instance, if you want to run a marathon, for some people the first step might involve running 10k without stopping. Whereas for another it might be going out to buy a pair of trainers. When you can be honest with yourself about recognising where you are, working out where to start become so much clearer.
Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of doing something really scary, fear of looking like a fool… Fear is probably the number one thing that can keep you in your comfort zone.
Fear can often disguise itself in many different guises, particularly as many people don’t like to admit that they’re being held back because they’re afraid. Taking part in an activity such as Firewalking can help you to not only recognise fear for what it is, but to create an anchor to help you next time you want to overcome your fears.
Previous Failed Attempts
If you’ve tried something a couple of times and not been as successful as you’d hoped it can be really offputting and not conducive at all to wanting to try again.
But imagine if a baby tried to walk but decided to give up after the third time it fell on its butt – pretty soon the world would be full of crawling adults.
Something being more challenging than we’d hoped or expected can feel pretty rough, but when things go wrong the critical thing is to learn from the experience, evaluate how you could do things a little differently, then go again.
Other People’s Attitudes
Can you imagine the look on my Mother’s face when I told her I wanted to train as a Firewalk instructor?! Having support from friends and family when you’re stepping out of your comfort zone makes things a whole lot easier, but the reality is that this isn’t always the case – and that can make it hard.
Family might be concerned if there’s a financial risk involved. You might be worried that people will think you’re completely crazy. And other people can often be pretty good at reminding us of the reasons we might not be successful. Other people’s attitudes can really impact on how possible, or probable, we feel we are to achieve what’s on our heart to achieve.
Although you can’t fully pick and choose your family, where possible do your best to surround yourself with people that share similar passions and dreams to you, and when you can’t? My advice would be to do your damndest to prove them wrong 😉
Putting Yourself Last
I often hear from people “I’ll do that when…” and then they fill in the gaps with the needs of everyone else but themselves. I think this is particularly true of women (though not exclusively) as many (but not all) focus on looking after the family and the home, leaving little or no time and money for the adventures they’d like to experience.
But, just like on an aeroplane where we’re told to put the oxygen masks on ourselves first, focussing on everyone else but yourself is not actually doing them any favours in the long run. It may be that at certain times in your life you need to look for different ways to step out of your comfort zone, but living a life without limitations will fuel your spirit, and leave you with so much to give to others, as well as a contagious joy for life that will rub off on all the people around you.
Lack Of Self Esteem
You might say you don’t believe you could achieve a life without limitations. You might say there are many reasons, and excuses, and things that keep you in your comfort zone. Or you might say you’ll take the adventure later BUT do you actually believe you are worthy of a life of your dreams?
Whether it’s a successful business, an adventure, or just pushing your boundaries in a new way, you have to believe that you are worth the effort of stepping up, stepping out, and making it a reality. This can often involve working on some deep-rooted beliefs, as well as getting into a habit of loving yourself for all that you are – for many just growing their self-esteem is a big step outside of the comfort zone to begin with, but working on creating a mindset where you not just believe you can, but you believe you are worth doing it for is oh, so, worth it.
Overcoming The Things That Keep You In Your Comfort Zone
If you’re fed up of your comfort zone getting the better of you, and you’re ready to say yes to a journey beyond your limitations, I’d like to invite you to check out my Life Beyond Limitations club, where you’ll find oodles of help to not just help you step out of your comfort zone, but the support you need to stay there.
I support people to look beyond their limitations, to find a space where adventure meets inner peace